Anxiety prevents us from living a happy, serene life. We’re always on the alert, preparing ourselves for the worst, and this exhausts us. So how can we stop feeling anxious? How can we calm down and restore our inner peace? Here are 3 practical tips to help you regain your serenity.

1 – Stop being anxious: stop dwelling on the past

Anxiety is rooted in our past. Indeed, stressful events in the past show us that we are right to be anxious today, that it’s an appropriate response to living our lives.

That’s why, to stop being anxious, it’s essential to make the decision to stop dwelling on the past.

Or, at least, to stop clinging to thoughts that dwell on the past.

In fact, it’s not you who’s consciously dwelling on the past, it’s your thoughts. You have over 60,000 thoughts a day, and 95% of them are the same as yesterday.

In fact, our thoughts are automatic. We have no control over them.

So we can choose to have some of them: positive thoughts.

But, as we have 60,000 thoughts a day, we’d have to replace them one by one with positive ones. What a task!

Or we can stop listening to thoughts that take us back to the past.

In other words, whenever you see yourself thinking about the past, remember that the past is over. It’s behind you.

I also invite you to jot down this phrase and carry it with you at all times: “I breathe in the present, I breathe out the past. I breathe out the past.

Let the past go. Don’t cling to it.

2 – Trust in the future

The future makes us anxious. A lot.

We’re afraid that everything’s going to go wrong, and here again, our thoughts aren’t our best allies – quite the contrary.

They will panic and imagine a whole host of catastrophic scenarios.

And this only reinforces our anxiety, because we’re trapped by our automatic thoughts. We believe them.

That’s why, to stop being anxious, it’s essential to make the decision to stop being afraid of the future. To trust instead.

Because it’s really a choice you have to make. A choice between 2 questions:

What if everything goes wrong?
What if everything goes well?
The choice is yours. No one else can make it for you. So make it.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you to jot down this magic phrase and read it regularly: “What if everything went right?”

3 – Stop being anxious: develop your self-confidence

We’re often anxious because we don’t believe in ourselves. We don’t believe we’re up to the task.

We think we’re going to fall, to sink at the slightest problem, the slightest obstacle.

In fact, we build up an image of ourselves as weak, scared and helpless.

And that’s why we’re so anxious. Because everything scares us.

In other words, to stop being anxious, it’s essential to develop self-confidence.

To do this, we need our past.

We need to learn from our past.

So, go back 10 years: who were you? What were you doing? What were you doing? What was your life like?

Then go back to today: what have you learned in the last 10 years?

And what have you learned in the last 5 years? Since last year?

See how you learn, how you evolve. See how you’re getting stronger.

Do this exercise. Write down your answers on a sheet of paper and keep it safe.

Because as soon as you feel too anxious, read it again. Remind yourself that you’re learning every day. That the difficult events of the past have strengthened you. That you’re still here, standing tall!

That’s why you can have confidence in yourself.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover Fear of everything: Top 3 tips for the anxious and stressed!
Discover How to manage social anxiety? 10 positive thoughts to boost yourself

In addition, I recommend this inspiring book on the subject:

Calm the Fck Down: How to Control What You Can and Accept What You Can’t So You Can Stop Freaking Out and Get On With Your Life (A No Fcks Given Guide) by Sarah Knight
While this book may not teach you anything you don’t already know, it does convey the message with humor and kindness, which might make it worth remembering this time around. I also appreciated its recognition that not all worries are created equally, that we all react to the world around us in our own unique ways.
Whether a problem is big or small, whether it has a solution or not, worrying won’t provide a solution.
It’s funny and down-to-earth, and makes dealing with feelings of unease a little easier. If you have a sense of humor, I recommend it.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself.