Because getting off to a good start in a relationship isn’t always easy. We’re afraid, we’re stressed, we ask ourselves a thousand questions. What if he doesn’t like us after all? What if he’s not the right person? What will our loved ones think? What if something goes wrong? That’s why I’m sharing with you 6 simple tips to calm your nerves.

1 – Refocus on yourself

The biggest problem in our relationships is that we try to guess what others are thinking and what they want. In fact, we spend so much time guessing that we forget ourselves in the process.

What am I thinking? What do I want?

We don’t even know.

That’s why, to get off to a good start in a relationship, I wholeheartedly invite you to come back to yourself.

Instead of asking yourself: does the other person really want to be with me? And what will my parents, friends, colleagues and neighbors think?

Ask yourself: do I want to spend time with this person, do I want to get to know him or her?

Because you don’t live for others, to please them. You live for yourself. Your life is your gift.

In other words, be more interested in how you feel, rather than imagining how others feel.

2 – Asking yourself the right questions to get your relationship off to a good start

At the very beginning of a relationship, it’s normal to ask yourself thousands of questions.

But it’s important to remain vigilant.

Don’t get caught up in imagining the worst-case scenario or, on the contrary, the best-case scenario.

Come back to the present moment and ask yourself the right questions.

In my opinion, the best way to get off to a good start in a relationship is to make sure you have something in common. Real commonalities that are important for the future.

We don’t have to be exactly alike either, that would be pretty boring in the long run, but we do have to check that we’re not the antithesis of each other, because that could get very frustrating in the long run.

But what are the right questions about? Passions, lifestyle habits, relationships with loved ones.

For example: if you don’t like family dinners and you realize that the other person spends a lot of time having dinner with his family, you realize that in the long term, this isn’t going to be possible.

3 – Be yourself to get a relationship off to a good start

So, what does it mean to be yourself? It means stop acting like you’re on a job interview (laughs).

Just relax.

Of course it’s normal to want to give a good account of yourself. But there’s a difference between giving a good image of yourself and giving a false one.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you, if you want to get off to a good start in a love relationship, to really be yourself. To the max.

Because you’re a good person and you deserve to be loved for who you really are.

In fact, don’t let anyone make you think you have to be anything other than who you are.

4 – Communicate

Because communication is the basis of a happy, solid couple.

Yet, in the beginning, we tend to keep things to ourselves. We say to ourselves “This is just the beginning, we’ll see later”.

But I think that eventually it becomes a habit.

In fact, if you don’t communicate with the person right away, you’ll find it harder and harder to do so over time.

That’s why dare to say what you think, what you want and what you need.

Dare to say what pleases you and what annoys you.

Speak up! Communicate! Even if it’s clumsy, even if it’s not easy to understand, because it’s by doing that you learn.

So learn to communicate with your partner.

5 – Do your best

At the beginning of a relationship, we often want to do too much. We want everything to be perfect, we want to be perfect.

And this exhausts and stresses us. In other words, it’s not the best way to start a relationship.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you to do your best. Nothing more, nothing less.

So, when you put it like that, it sounds easy, but what does it actually mean?

Doing your best means forgiving yourself for your mistakes.

You’re going to say things you’ll regret, you’re going to hurt, you’re going to offend the other person. Because you don’t know them, you don’t know their sensitivities, their flaws and their wounds.

So forgive yourself!

It’s normal to make mistakes.

So take a breath.

6 – Forgiveness is the key to a successful start to a relationship

Just as you’re going to make mistakes, so will the other person. They’re also going to say things to you that are going to hurt and offend you, because the other person doesn’t yet know you, they don’t yet know your flaws and wounds.

That’s why you need to learn to forgive the other person’s mistakes.

Don’t ask him or her to be perfect.

So don’t pretend everything’s fine. It’s about learning to express your limits, and then it’s up to the other person to learn to respect them.

Communicate! That’s the key word.

Remember: you have everything to learn from the other person, and the other person from you. You’re creating something totally new that will be nothing like what you’ve known before.

In other words, don’t expect too much. Move forward with a light, optimistic heart.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover The 50 most beautiful quotes about love to share without moderation
Discover Learn from your mistakes in love: 4 steps to follow

In addition, I recommend this inspiring book on the subject:

Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples by Harville Hendrix, Helen LaKelly Hunt
This book inspires couples to delve into the deepest aspects of their relationship, gain insight into the root causes of conflict, and work together to create a conscious, loving partnership.
I appreciated that the authors explain how relationships break down and how to restore them. All in all, it’s a lot of work. But I appreciate the honesty with which this book explains the amount of work involved and the steps needed to get there. It will help couples determine if they are truly ready to do the work necessary to have a secure and loving relationship.
This is an excellent source of useful information and a must-read for all couples!

Thank you so much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself.