Are you shy and it’s ruining your life? Would you like to know if it’s possible to overcome your shyness? Here are 10 simple yet powerful tips to help you feel more at ease with others and improve your life quickly.

1 – Accepting your shyness

First of all, to overcome shyness, it’s essential to accept once and for all that you’re shy.

Why? Because you won’t be able to change what you’re up against. Because you won’t be able to change what you’re constantly at war with, what you refuse and reject.

Indeed, everything we fight against tends to grow.

So take a moment to look yourself in the face and say: “Okay, I’m shy. And I’m going to look for ways to be less and less shy.”

In fact, it’s essential that you understand that it’s not your shyness that’s preventing you from being happy in life. So, yes, it prevents you from communicating well, it puts you in embarrassing situations, but it doesn’t lead you to unhappiness and unhappiness.

It’s because you keep rejecting your shyness, seeing it as a problem, that it becomes one.

So breathe and make your peace.

2 – Stop constantly putting yourself down to overcome shyness

Because you’re shy, you tend to put yourself down constantly, to see only your faults and weaknesses, to dwell on your failures and to blame yourself a lot.

Then again, it’s not your shyness that drives you to constantly put yourself down, it’s because you believe your shyness is a problem that you constantly put yourself down.

Can you see the difference?

So I wholeheartedly invite you to stop this bad habit of yours that keeps trapping you in a terrible vicious circle.

The more you put yourself down, the less you believe in yourself, and the less you believe in yourself, the more you put yourself down.

So replace your bad habit with a good one: give yourself 3 compliments morning, noon and night.

3 compliments about your looks and/or your qualities, your strengths.

Because overcoming shyness means learning to see the good and the beautiful in yourself.

3 – Stop idealizing self-confidence

Indeed, we tend to believe that to dare to take risks and to succeed in things, we need to see self-confidence.

But that’s not true!

In fact, everyone doubts themselves, especially when they’re about to step out of their comfort zone or expose themselves to the gaze of others.

In other words, to overcome shyness, it’s essential to understand that self-confidence isn’t something that makes you immune.

In fact, self-confidence is more like a muscle that you build up day after day.

It’s because we do things that scare us that we feel confident.

So don’t wait until you’re fully confident before daring to do things.

On the contrary, do things to build your self-confidence.

4 – Learn to take risks to overcome shyness

As we have just seen, overcoming shyness doesn’t happen without taking risks.

In other words, you’re going to have to dare to take tiny risks over and over again.

Don’t ask too much of yourself.

Start small, start somewhere.

You could, for example, ask a stranger the time every day for a week, then maybe move on to two strangers or ask something else.

5 – Watch how others do things and take notes

It’s true that some people are more comfortable than others.

So why not take the opportunity to see how these people overcome their shyness?

What do they say when they approach someone? What do they do when asked a tricky question? How do they react when asked for a favor?

Be observant and take mental notes.

See what seems possible for you and aligned with yourself, and apply!

6 – Surround yourself with people you can trust to overcome shyness

Sometimes our shyness seems like a painful handicap, because it’s other people who make us feel uncomfortable.

They laugh at us and push us to our limits.

If this is the case for you, feel free to see less of these people and go out in search of more trustworthy people.

People who will respect your shyness.

So don’t fall into victimization either.

In fact, if you stay with people who always make excuses for you, who overprotect you, then you’ll never get over your shyness.

Find a happy medium.

7 – Accept that we can’t please everyone

Sometimes we put crazy pressure on ourselves to stop being shy, because we’d like to please everyone.

And more particularly, to people who don’t like us.

In fact, you don’t have to be liked by everyone.

Besides, if someone asks you to be different, to change so that they’ll love you back, then that’s not love.

Overcoming shyness is something you do for yourself, to improve your life and your relationships, but not to make yourself loved by everyone at all costs.

8 – Stop making excuses to overcome shyness

Learning to stop being shy will lead you to take risks and experience failure.

That’s why you need to stop making excuses, telling yourself that because you didn’t succeed last time, you can’t do it today.

Wrong!

See your failures not as excuses for giving up, but as lessons for bouncing back.

In fact, don’t give up on your goal of becoming more confident, but learn to bounce back and start again.

9 – Training for happiness

Too often, we think we’re unhappy because our shyness prevents us from doing certain things.

But we’re making a mistake.

We put conditions on our happiness: “I’ll be happy when I’m not shy anymore.

You can be happy right now, quite simply, because there are no conditions to happiness.

If you’re having trouble being happy, train yourself to be happy. It’s possible and even essential.

Because happiness gives you wings, it gives you self-confidence.

In fact, it’s because you feel happy that you’ll be able to work serenely and joyfully on your shyness.

10 – Learn to show off to overcome shyness

So, what is learning to show off?

It means acting, making videos.

It’s signing up for a sports class and attending it every week. It can also be a writing class, a cooking class or something else, as long as you join a group and finally show yourself.

Because the problem with your shyness is that you only maintain and reinforce it by turning in on yourself.

In fact, to overcome shyness, you have to show yourself!

To make this moment as pleasant as possible, show yourself in areas you’re passionate about.

Make videos about what you’re passionate about, take courses in what you’re passionate about.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover How to tell if you’re an introvert: 6 signs
Discover Ways to make conversation even when you’re shy

I recommend this inspiring book:

Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell
The novel traces a socially anxious freshman as she finds solace in writing fan fiction. It delves into themes of self-identity, social anxiety and the ongoing challenges of stepping out of one’s comfort zone.

Have you ever read a book that makes you smile again and again? A book that just leaves you at the end with a smile on your face and a sigh of satisfaction on your lips? That’s what this book did for me. Amazing characters, wonderful writing and a story that seems true to life combine to create another. A book that will join my list of favorites. I’ll read it again and again.
Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself