Is it possible to achieve true happiness – healthy, lasting happiness? How about using Maslow’s Pyramid as a starting point? Abraham Maslow explains that, to be happy, we need to satisfy specific needs, but not just any needs, and not just any needs. In fact, we have to satisfy our needs one after the other, according to a specific order of priority. In other words, there are 5 steps to happiness.

1 – Satisfying physiological needs

Physiological needs are: eating, sleeping, having a roof over your head…

Most of the time, these needs are met, but we don’t realize that they are.

In other words, we take it for granted that it’s normal, and yet we’re lucky. So, I’m not moralizing. Not at all.

I’m simply inviting you to feel more grateful for it. Because it will help you feel happier in your life.

Here’s the first step to happiness according to Maslow’s pyramid:

“I’m lucky enough to have my physiological needs met. My work allows me to do this, and I feel grateful.”

2 – Achieving a sense of security according to Maslow’s Pyramid

A sense of security means being safe from physical aggression and lack of resources, and feeling more or less safe in the event of accident or illness.

I write “more or less”, because we can’t control the occurrence of an accident or illness, or even the occurrence of a lack of resources following redundancy, for example, or physical aggression.

Here, according to Maslow’s pyramid, it’s all about achieving a certain sense of security.

The problem is that we often let our negative thoughts and (often irrational) fears get the better of us and make us believe we’re in danger. When, in fact, in the present moment, we are safe.

In other words, to be happy in life, it’s essential not to invent anxieties, but to take advantage of the good fortune of being safe right here, right now.

And to remain optimistic that we’ll be able to cope when the day comes, for example, when we run out of resources. What do you think?

3 – Work on your need to belong

Next comes the need to belong. According to Maslow’s Pyramid, this is the need to feel part of a group. First of all, family, then friends and/or colleagues.

It’s important to understand that Maslow’s Pyramid is something we work on.

Our needs are not magically satisfied. For example, we have to work to earn money and satisfy our need for food.

We have to work on our fears and anxieties to develop a sense of security.

And now we need to work on our need to belong. But how?

Feeling accepted by others is first and foremost a matter of working on ourselves. Quite simply, because we can’t feel accepted by others if we don’t accept ourselves.

Indeed, it’s impossible to convince someone that they’re worthy of love if they don’t feel worthy of it. It may sound simplistic, but it’s true.

So how do we accept ourselves?

In fact, we have to learn to take a step aside from what we’ve been taught, namely that we have to be like other people to be accepted.

At school, this may have been the case. But as adults, this is no longer the case. Indeed, others, the world and yourself, need your difference.

And, it’s when you accept that you’re different, different from others, that you can start to accept yourself.

Because to be part of a group is to bring your difference to it. What do you think?

What’s more, I invite you to pacify your relationships with others. To do this, lower your expectations of those closest to you. In fact, stop expecting them to be more attentive, more like this or more like that. In fact, every day, try a little harder to accept them as they are, with kindness.

This is one of the most powerful keys to happiness in your life.

4 – Work on your self-esteem according to Maslow’s Pyramid

Self-esteem means being proud of yourself. Let me reassure you, then, that according to Maslow’s Pyramid, it doesn’t mean sinking into total egocentricity. Not at all.

In fact, being proud of yourself is knowing how to look at yourself positively and believing in yourself. Believing in your abilities. It’s just essential if you want to achieve happiness in your life.

In fact, self-esteem is the driving force that enables us to set goals and achieve them, and thus create a happy and successful life for ourselves.

So, the problem is that self-esteem doesn’t just fall from the sky, as you’d expect. (laughs)

In fact, self-esteem can be worked on. But how?

First and foremost, you need to set up a virtuous circle: the more actions you can take, the better your self-esteem will be, and the better your self-esteem will be, the more actions you’ll be able to take.

In other words, to have good self-esteem, you need to take action.

To do this, at the beginning, take care to take very small actions, i.e. set yourself small, easy-to-achieve goals.

Because, all too often, we lose our self-esteem completely by making too many commitments and then abandoning them too quickly.

Example: we want to go to the gym 3 times a week for 2-hour sessions. Why not go for 1 hour on Wednesdays?

You want to lose 20 kilos in 6 months. Why not lose 2 kilos in 1 month?

So ask yourself what small goal you could set yourself to improve your self-esteem.

5 – Achieving self-actualization according to Maslow’s Pyramid

Self-fulfillment means turning more towards others. Finally, this last step, according to Maslow’s Pyramid, means that once you’re comfortable with yourself, it’s time to take your place with others. Serenely. Safely even.

Indeed, all too often, when we feel lost in our lives, we immediately turn to a job to fulfill ourselves.

That is, a job in which we put ourselves at the service of others to find meaning in our lives. And that’s great. In fact, it’s essential if you want to feel happy in your life.

But, for all this to happen, we need to go through the first 4 steps first, to get a solid foundation and build a healthy, lasting happiness.

After all, we can’t help others if we haven’t helped ourselves first. What do you think?

Then, when you get to that last step, it’s all about listening to your heart. And even listening to your joy.

What makes you tick? What makes sense to you?

Or what are your strengths, your areas of excellence? In what areas do you enjoy helping others, or would you like to help others?

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover Introspection: the 6-step key to happiness
Discover The 9 positive emotions to cultivate in your daily life: a step-by-step guide

I recommend this inspiring book:

The Art of Happiness at Work by Dalai Lama and Howard Cutler

The authors share their wisdom on how to cultivate a positive mindset, foster healthy relationships and face challenges with resilience. This book offers a holistic approach to happiness, emphasizing the importance of inner transformation and a balanced work-life perspective for sustainable well-being in professional environments.

Fantastic advice. Everyone has a tough day at work from time to time. This book shows you how to shift your focus to what’s important in life and how your work helps you achieve what matters most. I have recommended this book to many people and every one of them has loved it.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself