Finding our path, the one in which we are totally fulfilled, is our dearest dream. Yet many of us are treading water because we don’t always know which direction to take. Yes, we doubt. There’s too much at stake, not least our own happiness. What do we do when we don’t know which way to go?

1 – Which path to take: detach yourself from the gaze of others

The gaze of others is not always kind, especially our own family. Under the guise of wanting what’s best for us, people nip at our heels with their looks and criticisms.

Indeed, to reassure our family, we’d have to find THE way the first time and succeed the first time. Unfortunately, nothing in life is perfect.

And just because we’ve thought about our project for hours, days and weeks doesn’t mean it’s going to go according to plan. Not at all, in fact.

So, what do we do when we don’t know which way to go? Let’s detach ourselves from the weight of other people’s gaze. Let’s not let them scare us into believing that we have to get it right the first time.

Of course we can understand our parents’ fear of seeing us fail or sleep under a bridge, but that doesn’t mean we can’t do what we think is right for us.

2 – Stop wanting everything right away

It’s normal to be afraid when you’re contemplating a path you’ve never taken before. But fear shouldn’t stop us. In fact, we can be afraid and still act with courage.

So, yes, it scares us to embark on a path we don’t know. We ask ourselves: Will I like what I do? Will I succeed? Will I be able to make a living from it? Is this the RIGHT path?

Because today, we want everything and everything right away. Worse, we want to be certain before we even try things out.

How did we get here? How can we believe we have to get it right the first time? No, life is made up of trials, detours and changes.

These days, anything less than an outright success is considered a failure. How about changing this belief that’s holding us back?

So, what do we do when we don’t know which path to take? Be afraid, but move forward! Don’t wait for certainty, let’s try!

3 – Which path to take: choose to experiment, test, move forward

To know which path to take, you have to make a choice!

We can love lots of things, but at some point, we have to choose just one thing and concentrate on it! Yes, we can’t do everything at once. So let’s start somewhere.

I hear the “Yes, but…”. Yes, but if I’m wrong. Yes, but what if I really like this other way too?

Making a choice isn’t necessarily definitive, but at least it has the advantage of moving us forward.

In fact, we have to understand that we’re here on Earth, not to succeed, but to test, experiment and move forward.

That’s why we forget about the box we have to tick called “Success”. We don’t care about that. The most important thing is that you get to experience all the paths you have to experience. Don’t lock yourself in. Worse, don’t tread water for fear of making the wrong choice.

“You don’t exist to impress the world. You exist to live your life in a way that makes you happy.”

Repeat this sentence to yourself over and over again. Tell yourself that you’re here to experiment and move forward, not to succeed. Give yourself time. And make a choice, make your choice!

If it turns out that the path you’ve chosen doesn’t suit you or no longer does, change!

So, what do you do when you don’t know which path to take? Let’s simply experiment and move forward.

4 – Listen to your heart when you feel lost

Our purpose on Earth is to be happy. It’s not to be the best, to become what our parents wanted us to become, to live a comfortable life free from fear. No, our purpose is to feel joy, to feel the vibrations of our heart and to have a smile of wonder that accompanies us everywhere.

I’ve had people tell me they don’t know which way to go. They’ve been thinking about it for months, but no answer seems to be forthcoming.

To this I say:

“The mind thinks. The heart knows, because it feels.”

Having made the choice to experiment and move forward, it’s time to connect with our heart and not our head. How can we do this? By asking the right questions:

Do I love what I do?
What makes me jump for joy?
What’s important to me?
If I had no limits, if I had all the diplomas, all the skills and all the money, what would I do?
I know we live in a world where material things matter. That we all need the certainty of a roof over our heads and food in the fridge. I understand that. But all this mustn’t lead us to make definitive choices that don’t make us vibrate with joy! Take care of yourself now, but don’t forget to build your future.

“We need reasons to live as much as we need what to live for. Raphaëlle Giordano

So, what do we do when we don’t know which way to go? Let’s listen to our hearts!

5 – Surround yourself

The final step is to understand that we are all part of the human family. We are both unique and similar. In fact, the path you’re about to take, there’s at least one other person on Earth who has taken it, is taking it or will take it. You’re not alone!

We need to move forward to be happy. But we need to move forward, accompanied. Yes, having beautiful relationships with others makes us happy.

So, take advantage of this path to surround yourself with people who have the same desires, the same goals and the same values as you.

Look for them everywhere you go, on the Internet, but also in books.

Seek out their advice and their stories. Learn from their experiences and help them with yours.

They say you go faster alone. I don’t believe it. I’ve also heard that several people can go further, and with that, I agree wholeheartedly.

And don’t hesitate to seek out the support of caring, trustworthy people around you. It’s important to be able to talk about your feelings. Because, yes, you’re going to choose which path to take, but it’s not going to be an easy one. You’ll be experimenting with new things, and not everything will go according to plan. You’ll need advice and, above all, comfort and lots of laughter at weekends to recharge your batteries.

I’ve got a little phrase you can repeat to yourself every time things don’t go according to plan:

“Whatever happens, I’ll get through it.”

So what do you do when you don’t know which way to go? Surround yourself with people who can give you the advice you need to move forward serenely, as well as friends who can give you the smile and courage to keep going.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover Set the right priorities in life: 6 tips to stop getting lost
Discover Everyday serenity: 10 tips for a calmer you

I recommend this inspiring book:

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb

Therapist Lori Gottlieb offers a unique perspective on navigating uncertainty. The book explores the author’s experiences as a therapist and as a person seeking therapy, offering insight into the transformative power of seeking guidance. Through the diverse stories of her clients and her own journey, she illustrates the importance of introspection, self-discovery and seeking support when at life’s crossroads. It’s a compelling story that encourages us to see therapy as a valuable tool for gaining clarity and making informed decisions when we don’t know which path to take.

I love the author’s journey and that of her patients. There are so many wonderful quotes in this book. I found myself reading and suddenly Lori makes a statement that brings tears to my eyes. We can all relate to this book.
I loved it!

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself