Being disappointed by life happens to everyone, every day. But when it does, it hurts. We’re either angry, or we sink into sadness. So how do we calm everything that’s going on inside us? Here are 7 things you can do to soothe yourself when you’re disappointed.

1 – Being disappointed by life: review your expectations

We often forget that we can’t control everything in our lives, especially what happens to us.

Yes, things do happen. Sometimes they’re good surprises, sometimes they’re not so good. That’s just the way it is.

And yet, on a day-to-day basis, we spend a lot of time thinking, planning and expecting things to go exactly as planned…

That’s why, when we’re disappointed by life, it’s essential to review our expectations.

To do this, we need to ask ourselves a series of questions:

How is what’s happening different from what I expected? Why am I disappointed?
Were my expectations really realistic?
Did I have complete control over what I expected? Did everything depend on me?
In fact, the key to avoiding disappointment in life is to realize that not everything depends on you.

Indeed, sometimes results are slow in coming, sometimes they’re different from what we expected. This is normal.

But why? Because life always throws a wrench in the works!

2 – Stop comparing yourself

We don’t always see ourselves doing it, but very often we compare ourselves to others: physically, but we also compare our lives, our possessions, our hobbies, our qualities, our strengths…

And, to avoid disappointment in life, it’s time to stop comparing ourselves.

In fact, on social networks in particular, other people’s lives always seem more beautiful than ours, and without even realizing it, this eats away at us, as we take a defeatist view of our lives.

We say to ourselves, without even hearing each other: Why does this person have this and I only have that?

So we stop seeing all the beautiful things in our lives, we only see what we’re missing.

That’s why, if you’re feeling let down by life right now, it’s time to take a break from social networking. In other words, for a few days, don’t go on them, and immerse yourself completely in your own life, taking a gentler, more positive, more grateful look at yourself, the people around you and your life.

Remember, happiness is not in your possessions, it’s in you. It’s in the way you look at your life.

3 – Being disappointed by life: learning to be content

In the modern world, we’re driven to go faster and faster and to want more and more. As a result, we often feel frustrated too.

In fact, to be disappointed by life is to forget to be content with what we have.

And yet, you’re familiar with the common-sense phrase: “It doesn’t take much to be happy.”

So, what are you running after? Why are you running? Why do you feel disappointed by life at the moment?

Is it because you’re missing something? But look at all you’ve got.

Specifically, I invite you right now to list all the things you already have: a roof over your head, food in the kitchen… List at least 20 things.

Being content with what you’ve got isn’t to stop wanting more and having goals – that’s perfectly normal – but it’s simply knowing that you already have everything you need.

It means choosing to move forward serenely rather than filled with frustration.

4 – Accepting difficult moments

We often forget it, but we are living beings and we are mortal. One day, we’ll be sick, injured or dying.

Yes, illness, accidents and death affect people all over the world every day, so why shouldn’t we? So why are we so surprised when it happens to us?

In fact, it’s normal to want to be healthy, but when we experience a difficult moment, and it’s all the more difficult when we resist it, when we say to ourselves, “Why me? It’s not fair!”

That’s why, to avoid being disappointed by life, it’s essential to accept difficult moments when they come our way.

And, rather than wasting our energy fighting against them, we could do our best to get over them.

In other words, I invite you to ask yourself: What do I need right now to get through this difficult moment?

5 – Being disappointed by life: learning to persevere

Being disappointed by life happens to us when our projects don’t go according to plan, when we don’t get the results we want. So we get frustrated, and sometimes so frustrated that we’re tempted to give up.

However, the disappointment you feel should never lead you to give up on the projects that are close to your heart.

That’s why, when something takes a long time to materialize, learn the art of perseverance.

Breathe, accept disappointment and persevere!

To help you persevere, I invite you to ask yourself this question: What else do I have better to do in this life than achieve what’s important to me? No matter how long it takes.

6 – Know how to rest

It’s normal to be disappointed by life. It’s only human. And when it happens, it’s not about being ashamed of it, it’s about accepting our feelings of disappointment.

Then it’s about resting.

Because if we’re disappointed, chances are we’re feeling tired and lacking energy.

So, rather than thinking about giving up on your projects, about how unfair life is to you, think instead about how to rest.

What do you need? Let go of your disappointed expectations and simply do what gives you pleasure right now, in the moment. Come back to the simple joy of the present moment.

In other words, give yourself time to heal your disappointment.

Yes, the key to being disappointed in life is to give yourself time, not to grumble about life’s injustices, but to rediscover the joy of living.

7 – Being disappointed by life: seek the teaching, not the enemy

Listening to certain movies, commercials and success stories, you’d be forgiven for thinking that life is good for some people, that everything is easy for them and that they’re living in the most perfect of worlds.

That’s why, when things get tough for us, we feel lost and disappointed.

We come to believe, “If it’s not easy, then it’s not for me.” Sometimes we even say to ourselves, “Maybe I’m not cut out for happiness.

Then it’s high time we came back down to earth (laughs). Indeed, forget all those rosy stories. Life isn’t rosy, but it’s not black either.

In fact, life is sometimes easy, sometimes difficult. Sometimes things go better than expected and other times, not so well. That’s just the way life is.

That’s why, when you feel let down by life, breathe. Don’t take it personally. Life isn’t against you.

In other words, instead of looking for the enemy, look for the teaching. What is life teaching you? What do you decide to learn from this disappointment you feel?

How can you become stronger and more humble?

Because that’s often our problem too, we tend to believe that everything is owed to us. And yet, on Earth, everything is a gift.

So breathe. Look around you, look within you. There are no enemies, only gifts and teachings.

That’s why I invite you to ask yourself this question when you’re disappointed: What is life offering me with this experience that I wasn’t expecting?

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover Accepting what you can’t change: 5 great tips
Discover How to find happiness? 5 steps to finding it within yourself

I recommend this inspiring book:

Stoner by John Williams

Stoner delves into the life of William Stoner, a man faced with disappointment and setbacks throughout his life. The novel captures the essence of navigating life’s complexities, exploring themes of unfulfilled dreams, missed opportunities and the quiet resilience needed to endure disappointment. John Williams’ poignant narrative invites readers to reflect on the universal struggles to find meaning and fulfillment in the face of life’s disappointments.

The characters are well described. The atmosphere is dark. People cope rather than thrive. Despite the dark themes, I’m glad I read this book. A masterful writer.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself