The fear of rejection is the fear of being rejected, the fear of not being loved. So the person afraid of rejection prefers not to ask for anything, and even to run away. Alone. Fortunately, this fear can be overcome, step by step. Here are 4 signs that you’re suffering from a rejection wound, and how to get over it, step by step.

1 – Fear of rejection drives us to avoid relationships

For fear of rejection, consciously or unconsciously, we prefer to flee, to avoid getting attached so as not to suffer. Without realizing it, we suffer all the more.

Because rather than really knowing what others think of us, we prefer to run away. So, on top of the loneliness, we have to face the doubts: did this person really love me?

Yet fear of rejection is not a curse. It’s a wound, and any wound can be healed. Unfortunately, the cure is often unpleasant and sometimes even painful.

You’re not going to get rid of this fear by magic. You’re not going to wake up one morning and no longer be afraid of being rejected by others.

But, one day, you may decide to face up to your fear, stop running away and dare to ask: do you love me?

Because it’s time you realized that you’re ruining your relationships, and therefore your life, because of your fear of receiving a no. But no is part of life.

What’s more, for every no, there are dozens of yeses.

And if you stopped focusing on your fear of no and started looking for yeses, what could change in your life?

2 – The wound of rejection pushes us to flee into our imaginary world

When we suffer from the fear of rejection, we tend to spend a lot of time daydreaming. Without realizing it, we spend more time dreaming about our lives than actually living them.

What’s more, we don’t realize that the more we dream about our lives, the more disappointing real life seems in comparison.

In fact, it’s a vicious circle we fall into that ruins our lives.

To get out of this, we need to get out of our imaginary world. To start with, why not live a little more consciously in your everyday life.

That is to say, instead of daydreaming while getting ready, be present, present to what you’re doing.

In other words, put your attention back on your gestures, your breathing and your surroundings, rather than on your daydreams.

Your daydreams may feel good at the time, but if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll realize that in the end, your daydreams hurt you more than anything else.

Then, rather than dreaming about perfect relationships and a perfect life, focus on your real relationships and your real life. Try to extract the good and the beautiful. Practice gratitude, for example.

Because the fear of rejection leads us to believe that as long as things aren’t perfect, then it’s best to protect ourselves from them. But that’s not true! Things don’t have to be perfect to be beautiful and make us happy. What do you think?

3 – Fear of rejection drives us to sabotage ourselves professionally

People who suffer from the wound of rejection tend to shun all forms of commitment and responsibility. It’s their fear.

Because they don’t feel up to the task, they don’t feel worthy enough, they don’t feel worthy enough, they don’t feel important enough.

So, rather than take the risk of reality reminding them of this, they prefer not to commit to anything, even professionally.

So, if you recognize yourself in this, to get out of it, you need to work on your self-confidence and self-esteem. You need to feel worthy and important.

That’s something to work on.

In any case, know that you’re sabotaging yourself and that you’re perfectly capable of stopping it. Step by step. Take a deep breath and give yourself the right to believe in yourself and commit yourself professionally.

4 – Fear of rejection drives us to run away from ourselves

When we’re afraid of rejection, we tend to run away constantly. In fact, we’re unable to settle into a way of life that lasts.

And, we don’t realize that it’s not so much others, responsibilities, life that we’re running away from, it’s ourselves that we’re running away from.

We’re running away from who we are and who we’re becoming. It’s as if we don’t want to put down roots for fear of getting tied down somewhere, in a story, and suffering as a result.

So we rip everything out, rip ourselves out and run away. This happens regularly, like cycles. They depend on the person, but they can be 3, 5 or 7-year cycles.

If you recognize yourself in this, understand that in those moments when you feel like fleeing, elsewhere to do something else, differently, with other people, it’s your fear of rejection that’s expressing itself.

So take a deep breath and accept the fear that’s roaring inside you. On the other hand, don’t make any decisions until it has subsided. Because it’s time you stopped letting your fear of rejection make the decisions in your life. It’s time to stop sabotaging everything, running away from everything and running away from yourself.

After all, aren’t you fed up? Aren’t you tired? Then take a deep breath and wait for it to subside. It’s going to be a difficult time, and it may last a while: a few days, or even a few weeks.

Be patient, it will pass.

If, once you’ve calmed down, you feel you need to make some changes in your life, make them. But don’t uproot yourself and stop hurting yourself. You’re a beautiful person and you deserve to live a happy, serene life. You have the right to attach yourself, to put down roots.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover Having time for yourself: 7 mistakes to avoid if you want to stop being overwhelmed
Discover Life’s obstacles: 6 secrets to overcoming them with confidence

I recommend this inspiring book:

Rejection Proof by Jia Jiang
Jiang recounts his personal experience of seeking rejection every day for 100 days, filled with insights on how to overcome the fear of rejection and build resilience.
Finally, a book that works immediately: Never fear rejection again, never fear a no, because rejection has more to do with the person rejecting you than with you! And : A no is the beginning of negotiation, not the end.
This book has really encouraged me to stop feeling emotional when I ask for what I want. It has helped boost my self-confidence and, by extension, my self-esteem.
Highly recommended!

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself

Leave a Reply