How can we learn to be zen in this world that seems so chaotic? All we have to do is watch the news, and we see all the world’s problems. Not to mention our own personal problems, which keep piling up. So how can we find peace in the midst of all this? Here are 6 tips for learning!

1 – Accept to learn to be Zen

Acceptance is the first thing to do when you want to learn to be zen.

Yet there are some things and situations we just can’t accept. So how do we go about it?

In fact, we make a mistake. We think we accept something once and for all. But we don’t.

Acceptance is a process.

In other words, we accept the same thing or situation several times over.

In fact, we have to come back to it several times over a period of days, weeks or even months.

The advantage of this process is that acceptance becomes easier and easier.

But you have to start before you can enter the process.

In other words, to learn how to be zen in life, I invite you to list all the events that have been bothering, angering or upsetting you for some time.

For each one, work on acceptance.

Acceptance means not fighting, not resisting.

It means looking at the situation and saying: “Okay, I accept that this is how it happened. I can’t control everything. So, yes, I accept.”

Then take a deep breath.

In fact, accepting doesn’t mean pretending not to be affected by the situation: “Ok, I’m sad / angry that this happened, but that’s the way it is, I accept it.”

What’s more, acceptance doesn’t mean resignation. But, instead of putting all one’s strength into futile resistance to what is to gather one’s strength to bounce back, to better live the situation: “Ok, first of all, I need to accept what is. Now I’ll be able to find solutions to live with it and bounce back as best I can.”

Do this as often as necessary.

That’s what I do, and my life hasn’t been the same since I learned to accept.

2 – Refocus on yourself

Learning to be zen means learning to refocus on yourself.

Too often, we lose our composure because so-and-so did or said that.

In fact, without realizing it, we position ourselves as victims and the other person becomes our executioner.

That’s why we can’t manage our anger or grief.

Because we give all the power to someone other than ourselves.

So how do we stay zen?

I wholeheartedly invite you to learn to refocus, to come back to yourself and your emotions.

Feeling angry? That anger belongs to you. It’s not the other person who’s made you angry, it’s you who’s reacted that way. The other person is only a trigger.

In fact, you have the power to stop feeling angry, to stop being the other person’s plaything.

In fact, learning to be zen means understanding that everything starts with us, that everything is within us.

In other words, it’s not up to others to change, it’s up to you to plunge into yourself and calm down.

Of course, when someone makes you angry, step back and distance yourself. In fact, don’t stay in a place where you don’t feel comfortable.

Instead, refocus on yourself. Instead of saying to yourself: “It’s so-and-so’s fault”, come back to yourself and ask: “How do I feel? What do I need to regain my composure?”

To remember to refocus, set up a good habit like going for a 15-minute walk in nature every day or meditating for 10 minutes every day.

3 – Learn from obstacles and failures

Just as we tend to feel victimized by others, we also feel victimized by life’s ups and downs.

In fact, when bad news or unpleasant surprises come our way, we can’t seem to keep our cool. Worse still, we sometimes lament for days or even weeks on end.

What a waste of time!

After all, bad news and surprises happen to everyone, every day.

In other words, you’re nobody’s victim. It’s just the way life is.

What’s more, you have the power to transform the bad things that happen to you. But how? By deciding to learn!

In fact, life isn’t easy, because life is a teacher. It teaches us to be stronger and more humble.

That’s why, to learn to be zen, decide to learn from the obstacles in your path and from the failures you encounter.

Remember: you’re here to learn. You can learn, and it’s your duty to learn.

In other words, always take a curious look at the things that come your way: “What is life teaching me?”

4 – Giving thanks to learn to be zen

We lose our serenity when we lose confidence in life, when we feel that everything that happens to us is negative and will be negative.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you to practice gratitude.

Because, to learn to be zen, you need to believe with all your heart that you can trust life.

So, how do you practice gratitude?

To do so, I invite you to create a good habit for yourself: morning, noon and night, make a list of the 3 things you’re most grateful for right now.

In fact, the aim is for you to dive into the present moment and take a positive, confident look at what you’re experiencing right now.

Because, all too often, we let our mind ruminate throughout the day. And its role is to focus on the negative.

That’s why, by listening to it so much, we end up believing that there’s nothing but negativity in our lives.

But that’s not true! In fact, there are many beautiful things in your life, and it’s up to you to (re)discover them.

5 – Ask to learn to be Zen

Life can be lonely, especially when things aren’t going well.

We don’t understand why life seems to be so hard on us, and little by little we lose hope.

In fact, it’s as if we want to throw in the towel: “If this is what life’s all about, I’m done.”

And, we stop believing and we stop taking the right actions to move forward, to learn what we need to learn.

Remember: life is a gift, not a burden.

But you’re here to learn, grow and evolve. That’s why life always throws you situations where you have to step out of your comfort zone, where you have to be strong and humble at the same time.

Never give up hope, that’s what learning to stay zen is all about.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you to ask life for help. Ask it for what you need. Ask for calm when you feel anger, comfort when you feel sadness, confidence when you feel doubt…

Make life your ally, not your enemy.

6 – Training

Zen is not an innate quality. In other words, it’s not inevitable that we won’t be zen, that we won’t be able to keep calm, that we’ll brood endlessly and be negative.

In fact, being zen can be learned.

Unfortunately, we didn’t learn it at school. In other words, it’s up to us to learn as adults.

That’s what I did, and everything changed in my life, in my everyday life.

That’s why I wholeheartedly invite you to learn about happiness and the art of being zen.

I’ll be happy to guide you on your way.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover How to live well? Top 7 tips for living happily and Zen-like
Discover How to stay zen all day long? 9 morning habits to try out!

I recommend this inspiring book:

The Three Pillars of Zen: Teaching, Practice, and Enlightenment by Philip Kapleau

The Three Pillars of Zen by Philip Kapleau is a guide to learning to be Zen, offering a comprehensive exploration of Zen Buddhism. The book covers teachings, practices and ideas on the path to enlightenment. Through a blend of philosophy, practical advice and real-life examples, Kapleau offers readers the fundamental principles and essential practices for cultivating a Zen state of mind. It is a valuable resource for anyone seeking to understand and embark on the path of learning Zen through meditation and mindful living.

I loved reading this book. Not only did I learn about Zen and best practices, but I got to read stories lived by people just like you and me, with their transformative trials and tribulations, which is sublime. I couldn’t put it down. It helped me frame things better in my mind.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself