Bad news hurts. It’s a real blow to morale. What’s more, it can sometimes throw our lives completely out of balance. So what do you do when you get bad news? How do you react, and above all, how do you calm down? Here are my 6 sound advice.

1 – Don’t react immediately to bad news

When you receive bad news, the first thing to do is not react.

In other words, if you feel like picking up the phone and yelling at people, if you feel like telling someone the truth face-to-face, stop!

Because you’re going to say things you’ll regret. Things that might make the bad news even worse.

Things you may never forgive yourself for.

So take a deep breath.

Okay, you’ve received some bad news. Now, if you’re feeling feverish, take a breath and get some distance. Go for a walk, take a tour, do something else.

But above all, don’t let the bad news make you react in the moment. It’s not a good idea, in fact it’s a very bad idea.

Understand that you’ll have plenty of time to react afterwards. Calmly. After you’ve taken your time.

Personally, when I experience a hard blow, I go for a walk. I tell myself I’ll deal with it later.

Because I know I’m not fit to do the right thing, so I might as well take a walk in the meantime.

2 – Listen to your emotions when you receive bad news

However, it’s not a question of pretending – quite the contrary. We’ve just received some bad news, and so it’s essential to be aligned with and therefore attuned to the emotions that are stirring inside us, which may even be hurting us physically.

Listen to your anger, your fears, your grief too.

But how can we do this?

To listen to your emotions, take some time for yourself. Sit outside and listen to what’s going on inside you, or sit down in front of a sheet of paper and put into words what’s going on inside you.

Ask yourself: Am I angry? Why or why not? Am I afraid? Afraid of what? Am I sad? Why or why not? Perhaps I’m disappointed or frustrated? Why or why not?

In fact, putting your emotions into words will help you to calm them down. Because your emotions need you to listen to them, to become aware of their presence. That’s the only way you’ll be able to calm them down.

And it’s only when they’ve calmed down that you’ll be able to see things more clearly and make better decisions.

3 – Gain perspective when you’re going through a hard time

Sometimes we get bad news that doesn’t have that much impact on our lives and our future, but anger and disappointment can make us forget all about it.

In fact, we dramatize without realizing it.

So, to avoid hurting ourselves unnecessarily, it’s essential to take a step back and put things into perspective.

To do this, get into the habit of asking yourself this question: “In 5 years’ time, will this bad news still have an impact on my life?”

Because that doesn’t take away the fact that it’s bad news, that it’s normal to be angry or sad, but it will help you to put it back in its rightful place.

Personally, this advice really helps me to calm down. Because, yes, I do have a tendency to dramatize. (laughs)

And the fact that I can put things into perspective and get some perspective when I get bad news helps me not to fall into drama and therefore not to hurt myself unnecessarily.

4 – Ask yourself: what now?

This advice should be applied with a grain of salt. The “what now” is not tragic or dramatic, but pragmatic.

In the sense: “Okay, I’ve received this bad news, now what am I going to do with it?”

In fact, we’re not rolling on the floor, but on the contrary, getting back up.

In my head, I’m dusting off my clothes, taking a deep breath: “Okay, now what do I want to do?”

Indeed, the question to ask ourselves when we receive bad news is not “What am I going to do?” but “What do I want to do?”

Which is quite different, what do you think?

Next, I’d advise you to list at least 2-3 different ideas of things you want to do.

In other words, list 2-3 avenues to give you hope and also courage.

5 – Escape for a moment before reacting to bad news

Sometimes, the bad news we receive takes our breath away. We can’t think anymore, we don’t know anything anymore.

At times like these, I choose to escape.

I say to myself, “Well, apparently my mind isn’t available at the moment. It’s in shock.” (laughs)

So I do something else. Personally, I pick up a book, because that’s what lets me escape.

But for you, it might be doing a sports session, playing a video game or watching a film, for example.

In fact, if you feel that the bad news has “blocked” something inside you, first of all, understand that this is normal and then allow yourself to escape for a while.

6 – Accept and lift your head when you receive bad news

Then comes the moment when you have to accept the bad news. The moment when you have to pick yourself up after a hard blow.

There’s no magic wand for that. It’s a matter of taking a deep breath and facing reality.

“Okay, I’ve had some bad news. It happens. In fact, it happens to everyone, every day. Now I’m making the choice to accept it and put my head up. Life goes on and I intend to do the best I can with what I’ve got.”

In fact, it’s important to understand that life isn’t perfect. Not for anyone. And bad news is part of life.

So there’s nothing we can do but pick ourselves up and keep going.

So keep going.

What do you think?

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover How to stay calm in difficult times: 6 soothing tips
Discover How to cope with difficulties: 6 things to do

I recommend this inspiring book:

The Gift of Imperfection by Brené Brown

In The Gift of Imperfection, Brené Brown explores the emotional landscape in the face of bad news. The book encourages readers to embrace vulnerability and imperfection as opportunities for growth and connection. Brené Brown’s insights provide a roadmap for navigating difficult emotions, fostering resilience and finding meaning in challenging situations. By acknowledging and accepting the imperfect nature of life, individuals can cultivate a mindset that enables them to respond authentically and compassionately when faced with bad news.

This book is life-changing, a must-read for everyone in my opinion.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself