How to avoid ruining your life? It’s a question that’s hard to ask, but it’s a salutary one. After all, it’s not uncommon in our daily lives to have bad habits that prevent us from being happy. That’s why I’m sharing with you the 8 bad habits to avoid.

1 – Repeating bad things to yourself

Many of us repeat bad things to ourselves. Why do we do this? Because we’ve learned to from an early age.

We were scrutinized, graded and judged, and now, as adults, we judge ourselves.

And it’s not uncommon for us to think of ourselves at the end of the day: “I didn’t do well enough, I didn’t do enough. I should have done this…”.

We’re not proud of ourselves, but almost ashamed.

How can we want to be happy, if we let our thoughts be so bad to ourselves?

What if we changed things?

To do so, I invite you to set up a good habit to replace this one.

Every evening, take a few moments to give yourself 3 compliments.

What did you do well today? What qualities did you demonstrate? Or what did you learn?

Get into the habit of seeing the good and the beautiful in yourself.

Yes, no one is perfect, but no one has to be to be good and happy.

2 – Stop expecting things of others and of life, so as not to spoil your own life

We expect a lot from life. We expect it to smile on us.

What’s more, we also expect a lot from others. We expect their approval and love.

Waiting is perhaps one of the worst habits we have. Why? Because while we’re waiting, we’re not really living. Because while we’re waiting, we’re not really living, we’re not happy.

What’s more, we can wait for a long time, indefinitely even. Because happiness doesn’t fall from the sky, life only smiles at us if we smile at it, and others only give us their love if we give it to them.

It’s a universal law. We receive what we give. So there’s no point in waiting.

How about replacing that bad habit that’s ruining your life with a good one?

Get into the habit of observing what you’re waiting for. What do you expect from life? What do you expect from others right now?

To be happy, act as if you already have what you need and give others what you would like to receive from them.

Soothe your heart, free it from its desires to live in the moment with what you have and with the people around you.

Life is now.

3 – Being afraid

I’m afraid of… I’m afraid that… We don’t always realize it, but we repeat these words to ourselves every day. We’re afraid of everything, all the time.

Afraid of losing, afraid of failing, afraid of succeeding even. In fact, we’re afraid of change.

That’s why, all too often, we don’t make any changes to a situation that’s causing us pain. After all, we’re familiar with the suffering we feel, whereas if we change our situation, we won’t know how we’ll feel.

Let’s stop being afraid. Open up to change. In any case, if we don’t open up, the change will come suddenly and without warning. So let’s get used to change, both big and small.

Let’s understand that everything changes, and that’s why we don’t need to be afraid. Fear doesn’t prevent change from happening, but it does prevent us from preparing for it.

If you don’t want to spoil your life, embrace change.

4 – Spending too much is a bad habit to avoid

One of our favorite bad habits (laughs) is to spend, to indulge ourselves by buying small or large items that we want.

Unfortunately, the consequences can be detrimental to our happiness. Firstly, because our finances can be in the red, and there’s nothing more distressing than that. Another consequence is that our home becomes cluttered with objects.

Why do we need so many objects around us?

It’s possible that we’re spending money to cope with our frustration. Because we don’t know how to just sit back, breathe and be happy.

Yet it’s not uncommon to take our purchase home and regret it in life. We ruin our lives.

So I invite you to replace this bad habit with a good one: before you buy, let a few days go by. Just 3 or 4 days. If you still feel like it, chances are it won’t be an impulse, but a real source of pleasure.

5 – Have certainties

Being sure of yourself is important. But being sure of what you think and believe can ruin your life.

We can be sure of ourselves by remaining open-minded, i.e. by not clinging to our opinions. Being sure of ourselves means understanding that our worth is not justified by our opinions or by what others think of us.

Let’s remember that we don’t have to be perfect – we have the right to change our minds and make mistakes!

So let’s open our minds to the opinions of others, to their way of doing and seeing things. There isn’t just one truth, there are as many truths as there are people on Earth.

What’s more, by giving up this bad habit of having certainties, you’ll be able to stop fighting pointlessly, like: I’m right and he’s wrong.

Be happy by being open-minded. Just because someone else’s opinion is different from yours doesn’t mean you’re worth less than them, or that they’re worth less than you.

6 – Stop focusing on results to avoid ruining your life

Often, we do something in order to achieve something else. And when we don’t, an emotional storm descends upon us.

We scream our dissatisfaction and even betrayal!

We don’t always realize it, but to become attached to the result is to ruin our lives.

We’re not really living in the moment. We only fantasize about the future.

What’s more, when things don’t go according to plan, it’s hard to cope.

Having a goal, pursuing an objective, is essential to happiness, but let’s not forget that life is now, it’s everything we do today.

That’s why I invite you every evening to list all the little things you’ve done today and congratulate yourself on them.

See the efforts you make every day to move in one direction.

Your life is beautiful just the way it is. Don’t put conditions on your happiness.

Not to spoil your life is to decide to be happy, right here, right now.

7 – Keeping score in our relationships

We often say to ourselves: Yes, but last time, I was the one who did that…

As a result, we’re consumed by a sense of injustice and frustration. We ruin our lives.

A relationship isn’t meant to be fair at every moment. Life itself isn’t fair. Just look at the inequalities all around us.

Keeping score is how we break relationships. The other owes us nothing and we owe the others nothing. We maintain a relationship for the pleasure of discovering the other, of rubbing shoulders with them, nothing more, nothing less.

So let’s breathe. Let’s learn to give for the pleasure of giving. Let’s learn to receive for the pleasure of receiving.

Because keeping score can also prevent us from receiving. Sometimes, someone gives us a gift whose value is beyond our comprehension, and we prefer to refuse for fear of having to return the points.

8 – Stop working so hard that you don’t spoil your life

This is perhaps bad habit number 1, because it’s become a way of life. It’s become a value. Work is life!

But what if we’re wrong? In fact, it’s not work that’s going to come to our bedside when we’re ill.

It’s obvious that our work is important. It can even bring us great joy. But it doesn’t have to be the only area of our lives in which we give our all.

Let’s make room every day for the people we love, and for ourselves too, to take stock and savour our happiness.

Working too much is a bad habit that can ruin your life. And it may already be ruining it without you even realizing it. Take a step back and get a better balance in your life.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover 6 limiting beliefs that prevent us from being happy
Discover Challenge yourself: 6 tips to stop getting stuck in the same old problems

I recommend this inspiring book:

How Not to Die: Discover the Foods Scientifically Proven to Prevent and Reverse Disease by Michael Greger

Although the title doesn’t explicitly state how not to ruin your life, this guide provides evidence-based information on nutrition and lifestyle choices that can prevent and reverse disease. It emphasizes the importance of adopting a healthy lifestyle to avoid common health problems that can impact on quality of life. By making informed choices about diet and lifestyle, we can take proactive steps to preserve their well-being and, in so doing, avoid potential pitfalls that could spoil their lives in the long term.

The book ends on a gentle, loving note, with Dr. Greger acknowledging the ephemeral nature of life: “And we must make each day count by filling it with fresh air, laughter and love – love for ourselves, for others and for all we do with our precious lives.”
Loved it!

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself