Every day, we are called upon to live with or rub shoulders with people who are different from one another. Since every human being is unique, we are sometimes confronted with a certain category of people: manipulators. These individuals, generally of little faith, use several strategies of mental manipulation to influence the choices and decisions of their victims.

This article is designed to prepare you. In it, you’ll find the essentials on the subject, as well as a few tips on how to break free from the yoke of manipulators.

What is psychological manipulation?

Psychological manipulation or brainwashing is the psychological exploitation of someone to achieve a goal. It’s a means used in various social relationships to positively or negatively influence the choices of others. In other words, the manipulator’s aim is to control the facts, choices or thoughts of others.

Mental manipulation comes in three forms. These include :

the positive manipulation strategy;
egocentric manipulation;
the malicious manipulation technique.

POSITIVE MANIPULATION
It’s not often seen in a negative light. It’s the fruit of altruistic sentiment, because it comes from a good intention. In fact, this form of manipulation takes the form of gifts or promises to obtain a good result from someone. For example, a company director may award prizes to his best workers to stimulate competition and motivate the rest. Today, this form of mental manipulation is at the heart of marketing strategies.

EGOCENTRIC MANIPULATION
In this type of manipulation, the manipulator uses every means at his disposal to be the main focus of attention. He thinks only of his own advantages and profits, with no concern for the consequences his choices may have on others. He’s the perfect specimen of an individual who puts obstacles in the way of his colleagues in order to get promoted for them. Whether gentle or malicious, the egocentric manipulator doesn’t care about the interests of others, as long as he gets his way.

MALICIOUS MENTAL MANIPULATION
This is the worst form of manipulation. Here, the manipulator’s intention is perverse and paranoid. Their aim is to destroy and damage the image of others. Devious, this type of individual divides and conquer. He likes to discredit his victim and push others to act in his interests. So he resorts to lies, slander or a campaign of belittlement to tarnish the victim’s image. It can be a strategy to destabilize, devalue, guilt-trip and finally oust the prey in order to take their place.

The different techniques of mental manipulation

There are many different techniques used by manipulators to control their victims’ lives and influence their choices. These include reverse psychology, the foot-in-the-door technique and many others.

As a result, many people suffer the effects, without realizing that they are being subjected to psychological stratagems. Here are a few examples of psychological manipulation behavior that will finally open your eyes. Whether at work, in a relationship with a friend or in love, recognizing them will help you get out of this vicious circle.

MENTAL MANIPULATION THROUGH FLATTERY
Flattery consists in creating illusions in the victim’s head. The aim is to obtain something from the victim. With its particular impact on self-esteem, flattery is a highly effective manipulation technique. Although it sometimes rings hollow, it’s always nice to hear compliments about yourself. Women are often not immune to this technique, as it’s the hallmark of great male seducers. They generally use it to influence the choice of their female conquests.

GASLIGHTING, A HIGHLY VIRULENT MENTAL MANIPULATION TECHNIQUE
Gaslighting is a highly dangerous manipulation technique. Perverse manipulators use it to tear others down bit by bit. The principle? Make the other person seem crazy by destroying his or her perception of reality. The victim then doubts his or her own sanity.

Manipulation through insanity is very common in the workplace. It is used to deceive an individual’s vigilance in order to supplant him or her in rank. The victim, already carried away, only realizes that he or she has been manipulated until the very end, according to the manipulator’s plan.

THE STRAW MAN STRATEGY
This mental manipulation technique is widely used in both political and professional circles. If you’re active in either of these fields, you’ll certainly know what we’re talking about. For the uninformed, you should know that whenever your own feelings and ideas have been misrepresented, you have been the victim of this psychological manipulation strategy.

THREATS AND BLACKMAIL
Don’t be surprised if we refer to threats and blackmail as psychological manipulation techniques. Just see for yourself and think for a moment about the conditions under which you may have been subjected to it. In this mental manipulation technique, the influencer seeks to keep the victim under his or her control. Many workers fall victim to this.

Many women, too, are sexually blackmailed by their bosses to keep them in their jobs or move up the corporate ladder. So be careful, and make sure you stick to your decision, no matter what games the person trying to influence you plays.

THE SCAPEGOAT STRATEGY
This approach consists in making an individual take responsibility for an act of which he or she is totally or partially innocent. Its principle is false accusation. This mental manipulation technique is widely used in interpersonal and professional relationships, where many people fall victim to it.

TRIANGULATION
Every one of us has had to use this strategy at some point, perhaps consciously or unconsciously. But what is it? Simply put, triangulation is the use of knowledge and relationships to influence the choice of a partner. In other words, it brings a third party into a business deal to direct the choice of partners or collaborators as he or she sees fit.

THE DOUBLE GAME: AN INSIDIOUS TECHNIQUE IN MIND CONTROL
The manipulator plays a double game. If he is contemptible towards his victim, he is charming with other people. His aim is to isolate his prey. By displaying remarkable tenderness, he undermines the credibility of his victim, who won’t dare complain about his attitude at the risk of making a fool of herself.

SEDUCTION
Initially, the manipulator seduces his victim by doing everything to please him. He seeks to make her lower her guard and gain her confidence, so that he can then manipulate her. After all, people are less suspicious of someone they feel comfortable with.

VICTIMIZATION IN MIND CONTROL
Once the manipulator has seduced his prey, he pretends to be the victim of others. By seeing the manipulator’s vulnerability, the manipulated seeks to protect his tormentor. With this manipulation technique, the manipulator distances his victim from those around him.

Characteristics of manipulators

Manipulative behavior is more likely to be a defense mechanism put in place following an injury sustained in childhood. This could be abandonment, rejection, betrayal, etc. In a manipulative personality, this wound tarnishes self-esteem to the point of feeling weak and inferior to others. For them, mental manipulation is a way of forging a shell so that they no longer suffer from this inferiority complex.

From an early age, the manipulator knows how to spot the sensitive points in others. Smarter than other children, they develop very subtle strategies to get what they want from their parents. Manipulators are either :

over-indulged child-kings never put in their place;
children in the thrall of a manipulative parent;
neglected youngsters left to their own devices.

It’s worth noting that each manipulator’s character is different.

THE NARCISSISTIC PERVERT AND MENTAL MANIPULATION
According to the DSM IV, the narcissistic personality is characterized by a feeling of superiority, a need to be constantly admired and a lack of empathy towards others. This manipulator is very dangerous, because he sees his fellow man as an object to be crushed in order to exert his power. What’s more, trapping his prey in immense distress gives him a grandiose vision of himself.

The narcissistic pervert attacks the other person’s self-esteem. He humiliates them while making them believe he’s their savior. And yet, this tormentor sometimes appears very helpful and innocent, creating confusion in his victim.

BORDELINE AND MENTAL MANIPULATION
A person with a borderline disorder may well resort to psychological manipulation out of fear of abandonment. This is the type of individual who makes suicidal threats or blackmails others in order to stay connected. This manipulator loves sincerely, despite the harm he does to those around him.

THE PARANOID
The paranoid is a real tyrant who manipulates those around him to impose his will. Their personality is megalomaniacal, calculating and highly procedural. Distrustful of everyone, this manipulator has no feelings or empathy. He can become very violent if you try to escape his tyranny.

Mental manipulation: consequences for the victim

Victims who realize they have been constantly manipulated generally feel betrayed and suffer greatly. They’re in for a shock, and dwell on all the abuse they’ve suffered. Among the consequences of psychological manipulation on the victim, we can mention :

trauma-related psychological disorders;
shame;
desire for revenge;
lack of confidence;
constant self-blame;
feelings of inferiority;
chronic stress and anxiety;
feelings of incompetence;
insomnia or sleep disorders;
nervousness;
etc.

Mental manipulation: how to get rid of it?

BECOME AWARE OF YOUR CONDITION
Awareness is the key to breaking out of this vicious circle. First and foremost, you need to clearly understand that you’re being psychologically manipulated. This means opening your eyes and seeing what you’re experiencing: deception. But that’s not all. Once you’ve made up your mind, you now have to decide to get out, whatever the cost.

DISTANCE YOURSELF AND STAND FIRM
Leaving the yoke of mental manipulation isn’t as simple as all that. Once you’ve realized what you’ve done, you need to distance yourself from the manipulator. This is sometimes difficult for people caught in the trap of emotional manipulation. But be aware that manipulators don’t like to lose their grip.

So they may not let you off the hook so easily. But you can do it if you stick to your decisions. So you need to learn how to counter-manipulate.

DARE TO TAKE RADICAL ACTION
To protect yourself against your manipulator, take him to court if you have to. This is the ultimate way to get rid of mental manipulation. So get over your fears and seize the authority that can help you.

RECOGNIZE MANIPULATION WHEN YOU’RE WIDE AWAKE
You’ve just come through an episode of psychological manipulation. We’d like to ask you if you’d like to experience it again. Certainly not! To make this big “no” concrete, learn from the situation you’ve just come out of. From now on, set limits for yourself in your relationships. Finally, at the start of each new relationship, you need to be alert so you don’t make the same mistakes again. Know who you’re dealing with!

Now that you’ve learned a few mind control techniques, I hope you’ll be able to recognize manipulators.