These days, it’s easy to see that the Internet abounds with various sites offering personality tests. Similarly, practices that encourage self-discovery and self-knowledge are constantly multiplying. It’s not surprising, then, that most of us have developed a greater understanding not only of ourselves, but also of the world around us. On the other hand, individual differences have also become more apparent. Some people use this new ability to improve their relationship with others.

However, those who sink into social isolation and choose to remain physically alone are also increasingly numerous. This withdrawal can sometimes be momentarily beneficial. But it can also be dangerous.

Withdrawal: a brief overview

First of all, we need to distinguish between withdrawal and the need for solitude. The former refers to the “action of isolating oneself from others”. The latter is simply the desire to be left alone to recharge one’s batteries. In fact, choosing to devote a little time to yourself from time to time can bring you a number of psychological, emotional and social benefits. Favoring your own company from time to time can even help you build mental strength.

When you get away from the distractions and incessant interruptions of your day, you’re better able to get more done. And in a shorter period of time. In this way, you can set yourself apart, but not necessarily feel alone or withdrawn. Withdrawal, on the other hand, generally translates into social isolation. As a reminder, the latter is defined as a state (or situation) characterized by being physically separated from others, whether intentionally or not.

THE MOST COMMON CAUSES OF WITHDRAWAL
In most cases, withdrawal occurs as a result of past trauma. The experiences we’ve had in the past affect our lives. As we grow older, most of us tend to adopt a flight path to avoid putting ourselves in situations that have already hurt us. This is the case, for example, of a child who was once neglected by his or her parents, and who decides to withdraw in order to cope with a sense of abandonment he or she may have felt in the past. By isolating himself socially, he is reassured that this will never happen again.

In the past, it can also stem from low self-esteem or even an inferiority complex. The sufferer doesn’t feel equal to those around her, so she’ll make her relationship with others non-existent in the hope that they won’t notice her weaknesses. This is also known as “performance anxiety”. Fear of other people’s judgment tetanizes subjects, who therefore opt to withdraw into themselves. The same applies to excessive shyness, which is at the root of a “quantitative interpersonal deficit”.

HABIT
This can be a habit we’ve acquired over the years. We forge our character through the examples we’ve had at our disposal. For example, if parents are particularly cold, unavailable or even violent, the child may simply lose interest in others and become a socially isolated adult. The same applies to our upbringing. If an individual has constantly heard that complaining and showing any emotion is a sign of weakness, or that certain subjects should remain “taboo”, he will bring this tendency to withdraw into himself throughout his adult life. The feeling of abandonment will hold him back in any effort he tries to develop.

Withdrawal: what consequences can you expect?

Imagine being confined to a small room, with no social interaction for 30 days. Not many people would take this opportunity, would they? In reality, interpersonal interaction is inherent to human nature. Our system – be it biological, psychological or social – is built around it. We are destined to evolve in an environment that favors collaboration. That’s why older people are more likely to experience social isolation, as their relationship with others diminishes.

Withdrawal can also lead to heightened anxiety, and sometimes even to severe depression. Some scientific research has even shown a link with cognitive decline, heart disease and a weakened immune system. Others suggest that it increases the risk of coronary heart disease and stroke. This is mainly due to higher levels of stress, unhealthy sleep patterns and unhealthy lifestyle choices.

So, how can you combat it with a few tips?

Fighting withdrawal requires real effort, but above all a real will to overcome it. To help you do this, consider the following strategies.

Keep in touch with family and friends. Even if it’s just a phone or video call, make these exchanges a priority whenever possible.
Participate in volunteer programs. Sure, seeing someone’s face on a screen can improve your well-being, but encouraging physical interaction would be even better.
Join a club that interests you (book club, music club, collectors’ club, etc.) or a spiritual community if you’re religious. This will give you the opportunity to share your passion with like-minded people. This will make it easier to exchange ideas.
Indeed, when you’re alone, you’re more likely to dwell on regrets, worries and negative thoughts. When you’re with other people, you pay more attention to what’s around you. In this way, you won’t have as much time to dwell on everything.

If you’re having trouble coping on your own, don’t hesitate to make an appointment with a qualified psychological health professional. As a rule, interpersonal therapy (IPT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) are particularly effective. This specialist will help you identify the exact origin of the withdrawal. He or she will also determine whether it masks an underlying psychological problem. These may include feelings of abandonment, social phobia, depression or lack of self-confidence.