Love is an exhilarating and fulfilling feeling. But when it turns into an obsession, it can quickly become a burden on personal well-being and emotional health. Have you ever found yourself in a situation where your thoughts and actions were entirely dominated by another person, to the point of forgetting your own needs and desires? If so, you may have experienced “obsessive love”. It’s a warning sign of an imbalance in your love life. Whether you’re single, idealizing an impossible love, or in a relationship, focused exclusively on your partner,

I’m going to offer you essential keys to understanding this obsessive love, and practical solutions to free yourself from its shackles. Whether you’re directly affected by your partner’s obsessive love, or you’re a victim of it, I’ll guide you towards a healthier, more balanced love.

OBSESSIVE LOVE: PSYCHOLOGY AND DEFINITION!

To overcome an emotional problem, it’s essential to analyze it – To overcome an obsessive love, you need to understand it.

Each person has his or her own way of overcoming a love fixation – So before you even start asking yourself how you can stop being obsessed by someone in love, you’ll need to do some work to gain a better understanding of the phenomenon, so that you can adopt the right course of action.

WHAT IS OBSESSIVE LOVE?
Obsessive love, often confused with passionate love, is actually a psychological state in which attachment to a person becomes excessive and unhealthy – This fixation is characterized by constant, intrusive thinking about the object of obsession, leading to an imbalance in personal and relational life.

Obsessive love is not always a sign of true love, but rather a quest to fill an inner void or personal insecurity – It’s one of the worst scourges, because it destroys not only the confidence of the person behind it, but also the life of the person who has to endure it…

Emotionally, you may feel constant anxiety, a sense of powerlessness, and a paralyzing fear of losing the person in question – These feelings can lead to depression, social isolation and low self-esteem.

On a relational level, obsessive love leads to excessively possessive and jealous behavior, damaging the health and dynamics of your relationship – There are tendencies to over-monitor one’s partner, to constantly look for signs of reciprocity in one’s feelings, or to act in a manipulative way to maintain the relationship.

What’s more, this obsession can lead to an imbalance in the relationship, where the needs of the obsessed individual come first, often to the detriment of their partner and the relationship itself – It’s crucial to recognize these signs and seek help to restore a healthy balance in personal and relational life.

WHAT IS ONE ITIS OR OBSESSIVE LOVE IN PSYCHOLOGY?
The term “One Itis”, which originated in the USA, describes an extreme form of obsessive love in which an individual is deeply and exclusively fixated on a single person – This fixation can be so intense that it becomes the center of all the other person’s thoughts, emotions and actions, sometimes without the other person even sharing the same feelings.

This phenomenon of love fixation leads to a state of frustration linked to feelings, which can appear in a couple’s life, but also when you’re single.

A clinically recognized aspect of this concept is erotomania – This is a disorder in which a person is convinced that someone else is in love with them, despite clear evidence to the contrary – It can lead to stalking behavior or an unhealthy fixation.

Indeed, people suffering from this disorder may construct elaborate scenarios in their minds, misinterpreting the other person’s ordinary gestures or words as signs of secret affection.

While there’s always a fine line between each psychological situation, it’s always important to know every definition, because sometimes, even unconsciously, emotions can take control and push you to act against your will…

HOW DOES OBSESSION ARISE IN LOVE? THE 3 MAIN CAUSES

Obsessive love isn’t about having “classic” feelings that bring happiness – It’s a love that turns into something sickly and painful – But what is the origin of an obsession in love? There are 3 main causes of a love fixation:

1 – EMOTIONAL DEPENDENCE
Emotional dependence is undoubtedly one of the most frequent causes of obsessive love. It is characterized by an intense and often excessive need for a partner’s attention and affection.

This dependence may stem from a lack of self-confidence or a feeling of insecurity – Emotionally dependent people often find themselves in situations where their happiness and self-esteem depend entirely on their relationship, leading to an obsessive fixation on their partner.

But there are also two other origins to obsession with a man or a woman.

2 – LACK OF SELF-CONFIDENCE
I often say that low self-esteem is fertile ground for obsessive love- When a person lacks self-confidence, they can easily project their need for acceptance and validation onto their partner.

Men and women with obsessive thinking often feel that the person is better than they are, and that it’s normal to behave this way – It’s essential to understand that this is not an issue of seduction or feelings, but of personal development and self-confidence.

This projection often leads to a constant fear of losing the other person, a fear that turns into an obsession – In this case, the obsession is not so much linked to the other person as to an unfulfilled internal need to feel valued and important.

The habits you have as a couple, the way you live your relationship, the way your feelings develop, all lead to a lack of self-esteem – Your obsession with a person doesn’t arise by chance, but because this man or woman is special to you and you’re afraid of losing him or her.

But at the same time, you would also have felt it for someone else at some point.

3 – TRAUMA AND PAINFUL PAST EXPERIENCE
Past experiences, especially relationship traumas such as betrayal or abandonment, can also be at the root of obsessive love- These experiences can leave emotional scars, driving the person to seek excessive security in a relationship.

Obsession can then become a defense mechanism, a way of ensuring that history doesn’t repeat itself – This approach can manifest itself in excessive surveillance, jealousy, or an irrational fear of loss, leading to an unbalanced relationship and mutual suffering.

I realize this calls into question how you feel, but you need to change to feel better – This fixation can be controlled, but first you have to want it and put the right actions in place based on the cause but also the symptoms of your sentimental obsession.

WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF OBSESSIVE LOVE?

To combat emotional obsession effectively, and to know how to go about it, you need to target it and know how it manifests itself.

1 – EXCESSIVE FEAR OF BEING ALONE!
When you’re in a relationship, it’s obvious that you shouldn’t project yourself into the future, seeing yourself as single or thinking negatively about the future of your relationship.

However, when this obsession becomes more and more present, one of its most visible characteristics is to imagine that he/she will break up at any moment or, for single people, that you’ll never succeed in seducing him/her.

No matter how your partner or target behaves, you feel that you’re not good enough for him/her, and that breaking up is inevitably the solution he/she will consider – You feel you’re in a one-way love affair.

2 – INTENSE, IRRATIONAL JEALOUSY
Having a little jealousy fit every now and then, asking who the new guy or girl is on your social networks, isn’t particularly alarming.

However, when you spend more time going through her phone or pockets than enjoying the relationship then it’s a problem – When you never trust your partner no matter how hard he/she tries, not because he/she deserves to be watched, but just because you lack confidence, you need to act fast!

If you’re single and you start questioning your partner, becoming jealous of his or her entourage, and starting to throw tantrums, get a grip on yourself quickly, because you’re falling into an obsession with love that’s likely to cause you to lose all credit with the person you covet.

3 – DAILY POSSESSIVE BEHAVIOR
Love is a wonderful thing, and wanting to share the most beautiful moments of your life with the person you love is completely understandable and logical.

However, systematically wanting to be together, not allowing yourself time alone, sharing too much and forgetting to leave some mystery and surprise will affect the attraction of your other half or the person you’d like to have a love story with.

4 – YOU CUT YOURSELF OFF FROM OTHERS FOR HIM/HER
Suffering from emotional dependence and obsessive love means forgetting yourself and forgetting what gives you pleasure in life.

If you don’t want to go out with people you know, or if you give up your passions to spend all your free time with the one who makes you tick, there’s a problem of balance that you need to resolve by applying the advice in this article.

You need to have a strong personal life not only to fulfill yourself, but also to show that you’re not a given!

5 – YOU FEEL THE NEED TO CONTROL EVERYTHING
Being obsessed with someone and needing to be reassured by their words, presence or actions sometimes means wanting to control everything.

Not letting him go to his friends’ game, not letting her go to the restaurant with her girlfriends, or texting her every two minutes to make sure you’re always there – Acting in this way is also one of the symptoms of this sentimental fixation.

WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PASSIONATE LOVE AND OBSESSIVE LOVE?

Many people tend to be in denial, thinking they’re in a passionate relationship, when in fact they’re not.

In reality, it’s an obsessive love, because it’s a relationship that causes suffering – The first step in moving forward is to accept it – This doesn’t mean that changes aren’t possible later on, but you’re going to have to open your eyes.

Let’s face it, there’s a fine line between a passionate relationship and an obsessive one, and it’s not easy, when you’re in that position, to make that distinction and know how to act – A lack of objectivity is often present, and that’s perfectly normal – It’s precisely my role to guide you and help you get out of this situation to find a balance in love, and therefore happiness!

To find out, there’s no need to type in the obsessive love test! There’s only one way to find out, and that’s by asking yourself one question: Are you happy, and if so, is your partner happy?

If this is not the case, then you need to take action to regain that all-important serenity, because it can be detrimental to your love.

THE DANGERS OF OBSESSING OVER SOMEONE!
Yes, loving too much is harmful.. – Especially if you tell yourself that you’re in love but he’s not.

Love is the strongest and probably the most beautiful feeling you can feel – All your best memories are probably linked to love – Whether it’s for your family, your partner, your loved ones – Nevertheless, getting fixated on love and thinking you love someone “too much” is a real danger.

Yes, it’s dangerous to be in this situation, simply because you’re forgetting yourself and you’re not in a balanced relationship – When you’re single, you stop living altogether and spend more time dreaming about that person or letting them control you than taking action to feel better.

Obsessive love means accepting to love someone who may make no effort at all for you, who may go days without giving you any news while you’re ready to do anything for that person.

When you’re single, having this kind of obsession with love means preventing yourself from meeting someone who might be right for you, and staying in a kind of friendzone that makes you suffer.

It’s not the kind of relationship that’s right for you, simply because you’re suffering and can’t find the right balance between you.

From the moment your feelings prevent you from having a fulfilling relationship and you accept things that go against your dignity, it’s dangerous to love in this way, simply because it’s not love, it’s very often just emotional dependence and the fear of being alone.

THE 4 KEYS TO OVERCOMING OBSESSIVE LOVE

Unfortunately, getting out of an obsessive love isn’t just a question of willpower – You need to take strong action on a daily basis to feel better.

To help you do just that, I’ve come up with 4 steps you can take today.

1 – HAVE A STRONGER SOCIAL AND FAMILY LIFE
This is one of the keys to your situation today – Not spending time with your family, acting solely around him/her cuts you off from your loved ones, and you need to react quickly if you want to move forward.

You have to stop wanting to spend all your time with this person, or wondering whether or not he/she will accept you going out – You need to be surrounded by people, and this is how you’re going to do it, by spending time with people who love you and take you out of your environment.

2 – FIND THE SOURCE OF YOUR SENTIMENTAL OBSESSION
An obsession with love, as I’ve explained, is first and foremost a problem of self-confidence, a lack of self-esteem that has repercussions on the relationship and prevents you from finding a good balance in your love life – However, this lack of self-esteem comes from somewhere.

Whether it has to do with your childhood, your physical appearance or your social relationships, it’s important to do this introspection so that you know exactly how to act and how to work on yourself – Identifying the problem is a prerequisite for finding an appropriate solution – Don’t wait until you’re at your lowest point to do this love-obsession psychology work.

3 – WORK ON EMOTIONS
Obviously, being obsessed with someone drives you to do things that are totally out of character for you, and above all, that make you unhappy – So it’s important to take strong action that’s adapted to your situation, and that’s why coaching is so important.

With professional advice, you’ll be able to change not only your day-to-day life, but also the way you behave with that man or woman – That’s how you’ll overcome the obstacles and stop being in demand.

4 – SET RULES FOR A FULFILLING RELATIONSHIP
When you’re in a relationship and you’re suffering from this sentimental obsession, you’re often afraid to impose yourself and put in place actions that can make you feel better – You can’t go on hiding and saying nothing to your partner – First of all, you need to take the actions I mentioned earlier, but you also need to communicate.

You need to demand respect, and if your partner doesn’t give it to you, then you need to distance yourself – He/she must be attentive towards you, otherwise you won’t be towards him/her – It’s by restoring the balance, sometimes radically, that you’ll be able to move forward.