It’s often said that seduction is an art.

And if that’s the case, then flirting by text messages is like painting a fresco with cell phone light instead of a brush.

Yes, you read that right. It’s delicate, it’s subtle, it’s high-flying.

But fear not, in this article, I give you my 5 golden rules for mastering the art of flirting by text messages.

1) THE RULE OF BALANCED EFFORT
This rule is fundamental when it comes to communication, and it’s even truer when it comes to flirting by text messages. The idea is to reciprocate the effort the other person puts into the conversation.

For example, if you receive a message saying:

“Had a great day today! I went hiking in the park and had vanilla ice cream, my favorite flavor. How about you, how was your day?”

… don’t just answer with a:

“Cool, my day was fine.”

It’s disproportionate and can give the impression that you’re not really interested.

Instead, respond with an equivalent effort, like:

“Sounds like a fantastic day! I love vanilla ice cream too. My day was pretty uneventful. I worked a little, but I also watched a few episodes of my favorite show.”

That’s what I call the harmonious ballet of balanced effort.

It’s a sign of respect and interest in the other person. It’s a way of saying, “I see you, I appreciate the effort you’re putting into this conversation, and I’m going to do the same.”

But be careful, this doesn’t mean you always have to match word for word, emoji for emoji. The key is to show that you’re engaged and invested in the conversation.

2) THE RULE OF GOOD TIMING
Timing is crucial in any kind of communication, and flirting by text messages is no exception. Indeed, the right timing can make the difference between a message that hits hard and one that goes unnoticed.

For example, let’s say you know that the person you’re seducing has a big presentation at work this morning.

A message of encouragement sent just before the event might well be appreciated.

You could write:

“Good luck with your presentation today! I’m sure you’ll do great.”

This shows not only that you’re paying attention, but also that you’re supportive.

But there’s another aspect of timing to consider: don’t respond too quickly or too slowly.

If you reply immediately to every message, you may seem a little desperate.

Conversely, if you wait too long, the other person might think you’re not interested.

The key is to find a balance.

This is where the concept of “proportional response time” comes in.

This means that the time you take to respond should be proportional to the length and complexity of the message you’ve received.

If it’s a simple “Hi!”, there’s no need to wait hours before replying. If it’s a long message sharing personal details, it’s best to take the time to write a thoughtful reply.

In short, good timing shows that you’re attentive, respectful and genuinely interested in the other person.

So keep an eye on the clock when flirting by text messages.

3) THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE RULE
In the context of texting, a positive attitude is a real magnet.

People are naturally drawn to people who make them feel good.

If your messages convey positive energy, the person on the other end of the line is more likely to associate you with pleasant feelings.

Let’s take an example.

Imagine you’ve had a particularly difficult day and you receive a message from your flirt that says:

“I hope you had a good day! If not, here’s a little joke to make you smile: What’s the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.”

In addition to showing that you care about her day, a little joke can make the other person smile and relax.

It’s a simple way to spread positivity.

4) THE CURIOSITY RULE
Curiosity is a powerful driver of conversation.

Asking open-ended questions is a great way to engage the other person and show your interest in them.

But don’t ask just any question. Prefer questions that evoke emotions and allow the other person to share their experiences, dreams or opinions.

For example, instead of asking:

“What did you do today?”,

you could say:

“What made you smile today?”

or

“What’s the strangest thing you’ve seen today?”.

These questions are more personal and require reflection, which can lead to deeper, more interesting conversations.

5) THE RULE OF TEASING AND INNUENDO
Teasing and innuendo are powerful tools in the art of flirting. Especially when texting.

They help build sexual tension and keep the other person on their toes.

However, it’s important to use them with finesse. The idea isn’t to make the person you’re courting feel uncomfortable, but rather to pique their curiosity and make them feel aroused.

For example, if the person you’re seducing tells you they’ve won a game, instead of simply replying “Congratulations!”, you could say

“Wow, I didn’t know I was flirting with a champion… it makes me want to see how good you are at other things”.

This message, while innocent on the surface, is in fact a flirtatious innuendo, which may pique the curiosity of the person you’re courting and make them wonder what these “other areas” you’re talking about are.

IT’S UP TO YOU!
By following these 5 golden rules, you can turn your messages from a simple text into a real flirt, arousing interest and desire in the person you’re courting.

Each of these is an invaluable tool in your seduction arsenal. Now all you have to do is put them into practice and see what they do.

One final word of advice, though: remember that every person is unique. These rules are general guides, but they don’t replace common sense and listening to your feelings and those of the person on the other end of the phone.

Best wishes!