If today I learn and teach happiness, it’s because I know what it’s like to be unhappy. And yet, for many years, I wasn’t really aware that I was. But one day I hit rock bottom, and it was anger that made me realize that it was high time I learned to be happy. Here’s a glimpse of my former life.

1 – I was on the verge of divorce

One of the things that made me realize that I was unhappy was my relationship. I was on the verge of divorce.

We’d been together for 4 years and I was in the process of packing my bags.

But before that, I did the same thing with my first two lovers. I packed my suitcase after 3-4 years.

And that’s when I realized that I was stuck in a pattern of repetition, that there was something inside me that kept pushing me to make the same mistakes over and over again.

In fact, I realized that the problem wasn’t with my lovers, but with myself, since I was always having the same problem.

And, to stop being unhappy in my life, I had to learn to be happy in a relationship.

2 – Being unhappy: I didn’t like my job

I was only 23 and already on my 3rd career change.

In fact, each time, I was euphoric at the start of my career change, I was motivated and happy, and after a while (a few months, sometimes 1 or 2 years at the best of times), I would feel again that I didn’t like my job and that I had to change.

Here again, I realized that I was stuck in a pattern of repetition and that it wasn’t my job that was the problem, it was me. In fact, there was something inside me that prevented me from loving my job and being happy in it.

And, to stop being unhappy in my life, I had to learn to be happy in my work.

3 – Relations with my family were very conflictual

In any family, there are problems, but with my family, we had all reached a particularly difficult point in our lives.

And, rather than pulling together, there was a lot of fuss. We were hurting each other.

In fact, I became aware that I was trying at all costs to solve my family’s problems, to the point of judging and criticizing them, and I was getting myself into a real tizzy.

And then, one day, I was too tired to go on and realized that no matter how hard I tried, nothing changed.

And, to stop being unhappy, I realized that I had to learn to take care of myself and my happiness before taking care of others.

4 – Being unhappy: I didn’t feel at ease with my friends

I used to have a huge lack of self-confidence, to the point where I even felt uncomfortable with my friends.

I didn’t fit in, and was unsettled by the slightest change.

I knew there was something wrong with me, that this was my problem, but I didn’t know what to do about it.

So, to stop being unhappy, I decided to learn how to be happy, starting by learning to trust myself.

5 – I was so lacking in self-confidence that I didn’t dare do anything.

Another symptom of my lack of self-confidence was that I didn’t dare undertake anything new. Apart from professional reconversions, which is rather strange, because reconversions are scary. In fact, I think I’ve always had a strong need to be happy at work.

But what I didn’t know at the time was that it’s not so much the work you do that counts, it’s how you do it and why you do it. But that’s another story.

In fact, at that time in my life, I didn’t even dare to go out again. I was stressed at the thought of going to a museum or a swimming pool.

So I stayed at home. But I was getting more and more remarks from people around me, even warnings. And I told myself that one person warning you is fine, but when it’s a lot of people, there’s really a problem.

So, to stop being unhappy, I decided to take my happiness into my own hands and learn to dare and have confidence in myself.

6 – Being unhappy: I used to grumble a lot

In fact, I was the number one moaner. In fact, I still moan to this day. You have to understand that even though I’ve learned to be happy, I still have moments when I lack self-confidence, when I grumble and when my husband and I don’t understand each other. But now I’m aware of my shortcomings and I have the tools to find solutions.

In fact, being happy isn’t about becoming a perfect person with a perfect life.

So, I was grouch number one. In fact, I couldn’t see how lucky I was, and I realized it after 4 months.

In fact, I lived in Switzerland for almost 2 years (Study abroad). It was something I had chosen, something I had been preparing for months.

Then, 4 months later, I heard myself grumbling about my situation and realized that it was no longer possible.

So, to stop being unhappy, I decided to learn how to be happy and to learn how to be lucky and find solutions.

7 – I was depressed

I used to get depressed a lot, and it could last for a long time. In fact, nothing made me want to do anything or gave me pleasure. I wandered through my daily routine, did things automatically and didn’t smile very much.

I realized that the slightest disappointment, the slightest sadness took on too great proportions. In other words, I was clinging to what was making me sad, and I couldn’t get over it.

In fact, it was through meeting people who smiled even though they were less fortunate than I was that I came to understand that I didn’t know how to deal with my sadness and that it was ruining my life without me realizing it.

So, to stop being unhappy, I decided to learn to be happy and to learn to manage my emotions.

Being unhappy is now over for me

Well, I had to become aware of these 7 things in my life to understand that I was unhappy and that it was all due to me, my communication, my lack of self-confidence, my poor management of my emotions, my tendency to grumble, and I decided that it was over.

Because I wanted to be happy too. I too wanted to be happy in my relationship, at work and at home. To be happy despite life’s imperfections, despite heartache and disappointment.

So I decided to learn how to be happy and nothing has ever been the same. It was the best decision I ever made.

And that’s what I wish for you too. That’s why I created the blog Full of Happiness and why I’ve created unique articles to help you be happy in life…

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover How to be happy despite a painful past: 5 helpful tips
Discover How to learn to be happy: 8 powerful steps

I recommend this inspiring book:

The Lonely City: Adventures in the Art of Being Alone by Olivia Laing

Olivia Laing explores the theme of loneliness and the complex emotions associated with it. Through a blend of memoir, art history and cultural criticism, Laing delves into the lives of artists who have faced loneliness. The book offers an in-depth examination of the human experience of isolation and its impact on creativity, mental health and self-discovery. The Lonely City provides an insight into the many facets of unhappiness, offering a thought-provoking journey through the intersections of art, loneliness and the search for connection in a busy modern world.

Beautiful, evocative writing… Highly instructive and both artistic and accessible.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself