To stop overthinking is to stop giving too much importance to the past and the future. In fact, it means returning to the present, to calm and joy. Yet thinking too much is a habit of life. It does us good to say to ourselves “I think of everything”. But at what cost? So how do you know if you’re thinking too much? Here are 5 warning signs.

What does overthinking mean?

Overthinking is when we are no longer in the present moment.

In fact, it’s when we’re in the past, looking for the mistakes of others, our own mistakes or the injustices of life. We replay the same scenarios, relive the same difficult emotions and feel stuck.

Overthinking is also when we’re in the future, imagining all the disasters that could happen there, all the unpleasant surprises, heartache, anger and disappointment. We invent scenarios and experience difficult emotions in advance.

In other words, if you think too much, you’re no longer at peace. It even hurts us. And that’s normal.

In fact, we often find good excuses for overthinking. We say to ourselves: “I forgive, but I don’t forget” and “I prepare for the worst so I won’t be disappointed”.

It’s terrible when you think about it, because you can’t be happy by overthinking. What’s more, we suffer a lot when we dwell on the most difficult emotions: anger, grief, resentment, fear, jealousy, shame, guilt…

But all this is unconscious. In fact, we don’t think too much on purpose.

So how do we know if we’re overthinking, and how can we free ourselves from it to live a happy, serene life?

1 – Stop overthinking: you feel stuck in your life

You may have dwelled on an event from your past: a break-up, a bereavement, a family history. Sometimes even a phrase from someone who hurt you.

And you relive this past event over and over again. Sometimes you see yourself doing it, you see your thoughts focusing on that event.

At the same time, you feel stuck in your life. Nothing is moving forward. You feel like you’re treading water.

But you don’t make the connection between this past event you’re overthinking and this feeling of being stuck in your life.

To stop overthinking is to check that events from the past aren’t slowing you down, or worse, causing you to tread water in your life.

Because all the attention and energy you give to your past, dwelling on it, you can’t give to your present.

Yet your present, far more than your past, which is over, needs all your attention and energy.

In other words, stop wasting time thinking too much about your past.

That’s why I invite you to go back to those events in your past that you’ve been dwelling on in your head for far too long, and work on forgiving and letting go.

To do this, go back to the event. Visualize it as if it were a film, seeing the scene and yourself inside it. Imagine yourself sitting next to your past self, invite yourself to forgive the other, Life and/or yourself, then let go. Let go of what’s over.

To stop overthinking, practice this visualization as many times as necessary.

2 – You don’t trust the future

You’re rather suspicious about the future. In fact, you tend to say to yourself: “I’d rather expect the worst so I won’t be disappointed”.

But living like this over time is exhausting. Worse still, it takes all the joy out of life.

Because living in fear and apprehension of suffering doesn’t make us stronger – quite the contrary. Because love and joy fade away, and we shut ourselves away more and more in the fear that suffocates us more and more every day.

So, if you’re not confident about the future, it’s time to stop overthinking.

In particular, it’s time to stop imagining the worst possible scenarios.

In fact, we always have two choices in life: to see the glass as half-full or half-empty.

The choice is yours. And, to make that choice, it’s essential that you understand that one invites you to joy and the other to fear.

So, which will it be?

Maybe you’ll be disappointed in the future. It’s quite possible, because things don’t always turn out the way you want them to. But so what?

So, because you may be disappointed tomorrow, you’re making yourself sick today?

How about enjoying the calm and joy of today instead?

To stop overthinking, I invite you to repeat to yourself a magic phrase: “What if everything was going to be all right?”

Repeat it until your heart feels lighter, more confident, more joyful.

Remember, you don’t have to be afraid of tomorrow.

In fact, you don’t need to prepare yourself, you just need to learn to trust and welcome events as they come.

3 – Stop thinking too much: you’re bored with your life

You have the impression that your daily life is sad and bland. In fact, there’s no joy in your life.

Again, this is a sign that it’s time to stop overthinking, because when you overthink, you become completely disconnected from the present. You get lost in thoughts that lead you to yesterday or tomorrow.

That’s why, in the meantime, you don’t take care of the present.

Yet joy doesn’t come into your life by chance. It comes because you invite it, make room for it and nurture it.

And all that time lost in your thoughts is time you don’t take to take care of your present and your joy.

In other words, to stop overthinking, make your joie de vivre your main objective, your daily priority.

To do this, start by asking yourself: what makes me happy? What do I enjoy doing?

Or, what would I like to do, but have never dared?

Then go for it. Even if it’s not perfect, even if it’ll never be perfect.

So stop overthinking and go in search of your joy.

4 – Your life is like a to-do list

When you think about Monday, you make a mental list of everything you have to do. For Tuesday and even Saturday, it’s the same thing…

In fact, your life is like a to-do list. Everything is organized.

In a way, this calms you down, because knowing what you have to do means you won’t forget anything and you’ll be efficient. It goes even further, because consciously or unconsciously, it gives you the impression that you have a full life.

But, on the other hand, and you may not realize it yet, but it’s stressing you out and weighing you down. You’d like more lightness and more time for yourself, to take care of yourself and even to do nothing.

In fact, you’re torn between two completely different visions of life, and it’s undermining your morale.

What do you choose?

What if you could have both? What if it’s all a question of balance?

Because there’s good in being organized, and good in being unorganized.

Stopping overthinking means organizing the things that really need to be organized for us to feel serene, and it means leaving time just for ourselves, to do what we want or need in the moment.

That’s why I invite you to make a list of all the things you need to organize to feel good, and to organize only those things.

Then, I invite you to follow a habit: to have only one or two commitments a day, no more, to give yourself two or three time slots a week in which you have nothing to do, and finally to give yourself one weekend a month without making any commitments.

After all, to stop overthinking is to live in the moment.

5 – You don’t really have any goals or projects

You have ideas, desires, projects and dreams. Unfortunately, as soon as you start thinking about taking the plunge, you start overthinking things: “But if this or that happens, then this and that will happen…”

Fears creep in, preventing you from taking action.

That’s why, if you don’t really have any goals or projects at the moment, it’s not that you don’t have any ideas or desires, it’s that you’re overthinking and that’s preventing you from taking small actions with confidence and serenity.

To stop overthinking and set goals, it’s essential to learn to free yourself from the stakes.

In fact, when we set ourselves a goal, we always think of the finish line, the top of the mountain. Our gaze is fixed up there, and when our mind becomes aware of how far we have to go, and especially when it starts to imagine all the obstacles we’ll have to overcome along the way, it blocks the whole process.

In other words, free yourself from the stakes. To do this, don’t look at your final goal, but rather at your next small step forward.

Let’s say your goal is to change jobs. Rather than imagining yourself at your next job right away, simply imagine yourself researching the job or jobs that might appeal to you.

Start somewhere. Start small. Remember this when you feel you’re overthinking things.

How do you stop overthinking?

Here’s a quick rundown of the top 8 tips to stop overthinking:

Come back to the present moment: focus on those 5 senses
Repeat to yourself: “What if everything went well?”
Work on forgiving and letting go as many times as necessary of past events that are weighing you down.
Organize what needs organizing. But no more than that.
Give ourselves times each week when we have nothing planned. Just to do what pleases us in the moment.
Free ourselves from the stakes when we embark on a new project. Focus on the first small action.
Make joy your daily priority. When we feel stressed or worried, it’s time to do something that makes us smile.
Remember that we don’t have to think too much. We don’t need that in our lives. Instead, we need to learn to welcome the things that come, to let go of those that are over, to forgive, to forgive ourselves and above all to learn to love life, others and ourselves with all our heart. Because love refocuses us on what’s essential, it gives us confidence in ourselves, in others and in life. It makes us stronger and more humble. To choose love is to stop choosing fear.

Find out more:

I invite you to read these 2 complementary articles:

Discover How can I stop thinking? 3 techniques to calm your mind
Discover Stop overthinking, do something: 3 ways to take action

I recommend this inspiring book:

The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play by Neil A. Fiore

The author tackles the subject of overthinking by proposing a strategic program for overcoming procrastination and cultivating a more present-centered state of mind. Fiore’s approach combines psychological insights with practical strategies to help individuals break the cycle of overthinking and perfectionism. With a focus on guilt-free play and a proactive approach to tasks, the book guides us to change our mindset and embrace the present moment. It offers practical ways to effectively manage time, reduce stress and foster a more balanced, mindful approach to work and life.

If you want to cultivate a good habit or are struggling to break a bad one, this is the book for you.
I think everyone should read this book, but especially those who suffer from ADHD or chronic procrastination.

Thank you very much for reading this article.

If you liked it, let me know in the comments.

Take care of yourself